at the beginning with you
"idk" //
Friday, November 19, 2010 ( 12:56 PM )
I'm bored. And sad. But mostly bored. Christmas is coming~ I bought a MAD AWESOME shirt yesterday which was a total STEAL!!! ;D Rachel's prom is tomorrow sia... o.o And 2E1'10 class chalet is this sun. I don't think I'm staying over though. There's something about staying over at a chalet that unnerves me. Not sure about 6FAITH'08 chalet though. I miss those awesome guys. D;
Should I privatize my blog?? I feel the sudden need to pour everything out here. :X YAAAY!! My Mr Men Little Miss collection is almost finished. ^^ HAHA!! I haven't been SMS-ing much these few days; and my hands feel weird... ><
I told Ruth part 1 of my story yesterday. Maybe going to finish it up today?? Sigh. I don't know what to do anymore. My life's so sucky. .________. Hesh. I don't know what else to say le so I guess I'm gonna go now. Later~
a fresh start //
Thursday, November 18, 2010 ( 2:30 PM )
I'm happy for you, I really am. But did you have to run off and leave me in the dust, alone? I guess you never really thought of how others would feel, huh? Oh well, it's all in the past now; don't worry, I'm a big girl, I can move on. I just hope you appreciate what you have now and never take it for granted. Oh! And don't forget what we once had, because I certainly won't. I guess it's time for me to close this chapter and start on a fresh page. So I'm closing the door and saying goodbye. I'll miss you.
3E4 next year... Mixed feelings. :X Sigh. I don't know what to say anymore. I feel like a zombie, just breezing through the day, following the usual routine. And I'm sick and tired of it. Why is it so hard for me to move on and let go?! Why is it so easy for me to fall into like and then so hard to forget and free my heart?! This is all just too painful for me, so I'm now going to learn to lock my heart, and not allow me to love anymore. It's just too hard on me.
I'm gonna go write a Letter To God now. So long.
passing by //
Tuesday, November 16, 2010 ( 10:22 PM )
._____. Everyone around me's moving on; they're all letting go of the past and getting over their guys. What about me?? I'm lolly-gagging, day-dreaming and worst of all, I'm stuck in the moment. I honestly don't know if I'm fully over him. The first real J. I don't know at all. And now, I'm afraid I'll never be able to move on, to grow up; and I'm sick of it. I'm sick of watching other people running past me, laughing at me, whilst I'm just 'resting' there. I'm sick of sitting here waiting for something to happen. I'm sick of never being able to get real and let go. And, I'm sick of myself. Gosh I suck.
Sigh. Now, I know, no one can help me but myself. I tried lying to myself, tried telling myself that things will get better, that I will eventually forget and move on. I'm such a horrible liar.
Move on Rebecca. Move on.
dedications //
Friday, November 5, 2010 ( 11:11 PM )
BACK!! ;D Watched "You Again" today with Jia Wei and Man Chun and I laughed so much!! ^^ So, even though I know it's a little late, HERE'S THE DEDICATIONS~!!
Cherie - HEY HYPER KIDDIE!! :D Even though I can honestly say that I don't really know you that well, I know that you're an awesome girl who helps to brighten up our class. :)) And for that I thank you. xD
Chermaine - CHERMAINE!!! I've always known you as the sporty tomboy/ girly-girly who is damn hardworking and works hard to pull up your grades. ;D I'm glad that I met you and I hope we'll be in the same class again next year!! :)
Clare - CURLY HAIR~!! [Sorry, I couldn't resist. :X] Thanks for always chatting with me in class and really BRIGHTENING up 2E1'10. Oh and MAJORLY entertaining all of us with your hopping around, screaming and crazy hair shaking. :D HAHA!! I hope we can still maintain our friendship despite whatever happens next year, yeah?? ;]
Esther - Esther, I would like to say that I'm REALLY REALLLLLLLLLLY sorry I treated you like crap this past year, and I hope that we can put all that behind us and start afresh. :) Other than that, I have to say that I admire your smarts and diligence. All the best for the rest of this year and the whole of next!!! :))
Winnie - OMG WINNIE!!!!!!! THANK YOU FOR BEING THERE FOR ME WHENEVER I NEED YOU!!! >< Thanks for listening to my shit and for enduring me... I really can't thank you enough for all that you've done for me and Rachel. :\ I LOVE YOU SO SO MUCH!!! ;)
Jing Hui - MY DEAR DARLING~!! I can't believe I pushed you aside so much and let you fall but didn't catch. I'm so, so sorry. ); Will you forgive me?? You've been the best Darling I can wish for and I treated you so badly... Sigh. I'm going to be here for you from now on, sorry it took me so long. ANYWAYS, THANK YOU FOR YOUR CUTENESS THAT NEVER FAILS TO CRACK ME UP AND MAKE ME SMILE!!! xD I LOVE YOU LOTS AND LOTS!!!! <3
Qi Qing - My shy and soft-spoken dear dear. :) I envy your perseverance and sheer determination. O: Can you give me at least a spoonful of them?? :X I need them... I wanna ask, what helps you put a smile on your face all the time?? Nothing seems to bring you down, and I admire that in you. :) Ya know, I'm jealous of you?? Haha... Well, all I can say now is all the best for everything and may you succeed in everything you do. :D
Gracia - GRACIA~!! I know we've had our ups and downs these few years and I wanna apologize for everything. I love you and your awesomeness and randomness and your manga-ness. I really really hope that I'll still see you in my class next year. ;) HAHA!! Thanks for listening to me when I needed someone to unload on. I'll never thank you enough for that. ^^
Ikhmah - IKHMAH LOVELIEST!!! <3 I thank you for that fateful day in Bishan Library, our bonding sess. I can't believe how much we learnt about each other in the few hours we talked. O: I love you so freaking much and I PRAY that we can still be in the same class. Thank you for listening to me and offering me advice, I can't tell you how much it means to me. If you have any problems, anything you want to talk about or need my help with, I'm here for you. :)
Farizah - ELLO ONLY OTHER ELDDS MEMBER IN 2E1'10~ Hehe... Thanks for the awesome advice and for your listening ears every time I needed them. ^^ Btw, I'm crush-less now. Thank you so much for your help and guidance. ;P All the best and I love you Future ELDDS President/ Vice-President. <3
Aqilah - Thanks for the song recommends and that cute laugh of yours. Can't wait till Vietnam Trip to get to know you better!! ^^ Sorry, I still don't know you that well. ><
Janessa - Thanks for being one of my friends last year and even though your comments hurt sometimes, I'm glad you've changed for the better. ;D Continue manga-ing, but not in class!! xD All the best in everything!!
Rachel - RACHEL!!!!!! <333 I don't even know where to start. You've been such an awesome friend and I can't thank you enough just for being YOU. Thank you for keeping me grounded and being there even though I've ignored you/ pushed you away/ treated you like dirt/ taken you for granted. I'm so, so sorry. What can I do to make up for it?? Just thinking about you brings back all the good memories we had. ;) You are one special girl, Rachel, and I wish you can see that yourself. I'm really jealous of your strength, Rachel. How you don't care what others think about you and how you put up with the world. I'm jealous, Rachel. Can we meet up sometime soon, properly this time?? And I promise you I won't back down this time. Will you forgive me for all those times I let you down?? :X I love you and I'm sorry. ):
Rebekah - HEY!! Thanks for sharing with me your experiences and all that and for being my go-to person when I'm having problems with my relationship with God. ^^ Thanks for being you and leading our class for so long and putting up the typical E1 nonsense. :) All the best for everything!! x]
Shazwani - STEADIEST!! I think everything has been said and done already and thanks. ;] Can't wait for Vietnam and when are we going shopping?? ;D
Charlotte - OH GOSH CHARLOTTE YOU'RE AWESOME. Thanks for the mini Vietnam briefing and everything. ;D I love your randomness and hyper-ness/emo-ness. It's so... You. Hehe... Hope to get to know you more before the year is truly over. ^^
Jolene - CHIO BU!!! Hmm... I don't know how to further thank you... You've already done so much for me. And I've done practically nothing ni return. :\ If We Ever Meet Again~ Thanks for pei-ing me and singing and dancing all those random songs since last year. ;)) You're so awesome~ AND WEAR MORE GIRLY CLOTHES FOR GOODNESS SAKE!!
Javier - HOMO!! ;D Okay I seriously don't know what to say about you... "Thanks for verbally abusing me with Chee Keong??" I don't know. O: And don't worry, I'll make it to the class chalet. Or at least try to make it. ;P
Kay it's late(not really), I'm tired(not really) and my ma's nagging again(yes really). So, goodnight and I'll continue the rest tomorrow!!~ NIGHT!! ^^
We've all strayed off track at least once in our lives.
